Frontier Dreams: A vagabond in my own home : a nighttime weaning update

Monday, July 15, 2013

A vagabond in my own home : a nighttime weaning update

We are now on week two of nighttime weaning. So far the whole process has had it's ups and downs, but it's nowhere near as bad as I expected it to be. Little L is taking it much better than I - I am so thankful for that! I guess he was ready for this. The first couple of nights I explained to him that he would be sleeping with Daddy and that "Mama umps" (that's his silly name for nursing) were resting until morning time. He responded with, "Okay, Mama" and that was that. He wakes up once a night but he falls back to sleep in mere moments to Kevin's whisper, "I love you".

Kevin has been a huge help cuddling with him each night while I find one uncomfortable place to sleep after another. To my surprise Kevin is actually enjoying this, for the most part. He has even been sleeping in a bit longer each morning just to have extra time with his little guy. I am slightly jealous and missing my little snuggly baby. It's a bit lonely by myself, even with this great book by my side!

I think it's become a game for Little L to try and find me in the morning. I have been sleeping in just about every nook and cranny of our home trying to find someplace that doesn't make my back ache. I have even spent a night sleeping on the dog bed (an old futon mattress) with Beowulf.

All in all, I think things are progressing quite well. I don't want to rush him or push him past what he is ready for so we are just taking it slow. However, I am quite curious about my state of rest. I don't know if I got less sleep before with Little L nursing all night or now with sleeping in uncomfortable places. Maybe this week I can try to sneak back into my own bed, but we'll just see how it goes. One baby step at a time!

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Starr · 611 weeks ago

I too must start night weening my 2.2 year old and hope I have as much luck as you are having.

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akeeys 65p · 611 weeks ago

Sounds like it was the right time for him which is wonderful. I've never "weaned" (just leave it up to when they stop themselves) but it sounds like the way you're going about it is so gentle and "right" for your family. I hope you're able to get some good and proper rest shortly :)

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atthebutterflyball 41p · 611 weeks ago

My little Emmett (20 months at the time) was only nursing at night, not even to fall asleep or during the day. The problem was during the last month or two he got to where he would latch on just after I had fallen deeply asleep, and demand to stay connected ALL night, or would kick, hit and scream. Nothing like my sweet even tempered daytime boy. And this was happening while I was 4 months pregnant, I was exhausted!! Plus I was worried that he might hurt the new baby as my belly was just starting to get bigger. He would try extreme wrestling with me to get to the goods, and even if he was asleep he was a rough sleeper, trying to stay latched on while tossing turning and climbing on my head! OUCH!!! Finally I just tried basically what you said and told him before bed, "no more at night". He did yell for a few nights but I stayed right there and held him and talked quietly and wondered if I was doing the right thing, while clutching the covers very tightly to my chest between us! After about three nights he started waking without screaming and would fall back to sleep once assured that I was still there! I feel so much more rested now! It's been one month and he hasn't even asked to nurse at all in a couple of weeks. Good luck! You'll be sleeping well in your own bed soon I hope!!:-)

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Anneli · 611 weeks ago

Nice to hear about your weaning process that seems to turn out well. I started to night-wean our three year old successfully some months ago in a way new to us that I read about over at http://www.ahaparenting.com/BlogRetrieve.aspx?Pos.... I didn't have to leave my bed using that method. I followed the night wean suggestions but still nurse in the morning and at bedtime. It's wonderful thet there is a method for every different family. I used some stuffed animals to tell him about what was about to happen and then retelled it every day and every time he wanted to nurse at night.

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lestermom 12p · 611 weeks ago

Maybe you could sleep with your daughters?

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3 replies · active 611 weeks ago

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FrontierDreams 111p · 611 weeks ago

Hee,hee, I did try that - they have the most comfortable beds in the house but they are twin beds and we quickly discovered not big enough for two of us to fit in. My girls loved the idea of a Mama sleepover, though!

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Katie · 611 weeks ago

Could they share and you have one of their beds for a time? I bet they would love that!!

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FrontierDreams 111p · 611 weeks ago

I have thought about it. They actually shared a twin for a couple of years and then they each got their own and pushed them together. My oldest really needs her space right now, though, or else I would ask them to do that :)

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taknight · 611 weeks ago

I was in the middle of our ween with our 22 mo daughter when you last posted about weaning. Now we are weaned! Only I did it backwards from your approach. We stopped day nursing first and then was down to nap and night. Then we cut all night nursing but actual bed time. And just like L it helped her to FINALLY sleep through the night. First a little snuggle was all she needed to go back down but now I am getting a full night and I feel so fresh after more than 2 years of being woken! I never left the bed though. The three of us are still in one spot. Giving up the last 2 nurses the going to sleep nurses were the hardest. She would have nothing to do with my hubby in those moments (he tried!) But it only took about 3 consistent days of replacing her nurse with a bottle at those two times and she gave up nursing (and bottle really she didnt want much to do it then anyway). We did find a new little bed routeen my other 3 didnt have at this transitional moment. The older ones went full on bottle to replace nursing for a bit with our bath book bed routeen staying the same. But not my littlest. She says good night to the older sibs and is now part of their route en. Then we head down and she has her bottle down stairs (not in bed like the others did) rocking away in my arms on the porch as the last bit of sun goes down over the mountain. After watching the sun go to bed she knows its her turn and with a few hugs in bed shes been going down very fast the last week. Its a lovely snugly routeen for a very sweet little one. I think if you find a new routeen to introduce him to it at bed it seems to be a good distraction from nursing. Also it seems our special close nursing time is now rock time. So it was replaced and she and I are both much happier with it and we had very few tears on 1 or 2 days. Good luck and I hope you return to your bed soon.

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greenfreaks 68p · 611 weeks ago

we are trying the nightweaning too. i have never nightweaned any one before, so this is a new adventure. some nights go really well, and some nights i am just to pooped to fight with little miss and nurse her. i am wondering if i moved out for a few nights if it might go better. hmmmm

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Nicole Kleemann · 611 weeks ago

I also just started night weaning my 15 month old. She rooms in with us still but if we were still co-sleeping it'd be much harder! Praying you find a good resting place!

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J. Marie Weldon · 611 weeks ago

That's a great book! (We got the video too--so neat. He's a great encouragement for me in my classroom too--makes me feel brave to try new things.)

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1 reply · active 611 weeks ago

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FrontierDreams 111p · 611 weeks ago

Yes! I actually just picked up the DVD from our library and hope to watch it with Kevin this weekend! I ended up buying my own copy of the book, too. It's just too good to not highlight and make notes in :p

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Rebecca · 611 weeks ago

Oh my!! How about putting one of the girl's on a makeshift bed on the floor so you can take over their bed? Usually little ones sleep well anywhere while, I would be just dying sleeping on the floor or an old futon! And if they liked the idea of a mommy sleepover, I bed they'd love to be on the floor - on that old futon or on some couch cushions or something. Just a thought....

Glad to hear the weaning part is going well!

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