Sunday, June 16, 2013

Bittersweet (not just a school)

Thank you Portland Waldorf School for allowing us to live our dream these past three years. What a blessing!! (pics taken over the last two days of school) IMG_2784 Our beloved home. peeking into K's classroom (during handwork) peeking into K's classroom during her handwork lesson. IMG_2568 IMG_2575 You can (just barely) see our church's steeple in the background. I have loved how close it is to school - a nice reminder for our whole family. Bubba IMG_2671 IMG_2676 IMG_2680 IMG_2678 End of the year picnic with yummy sorbet to celebrate with. I love watching K nurture Little L. She loves him so. IMG_2704 IMG_2705 IMG_2711 IMG_2710 Fun towards the end of the picnic. Some of our students and siblings worked together to dumpster dive (in true punk rock fashion), gathering cardboard used in geometry (?) lessons. The cardboard pieces became a house, tent, car, shade from the sun and then finally a slide. Creative play at it's finest!! IMG_2718 IMG_2724 hexamid IMG_2733 IMG_2731 Triumph! The school's hexamid is a favorite amongst most who visit, but you must be in the second grade and above to use it. It is a rite of passage of sorts. On the last day of school, K's teacher told her class that they were officially second graders and then let them climb on it. What a huge joy that was! K spent three years practicing her patience waiting for that moment. I think it was well worth the wait. IMG_2748 IMG_2750 IMG_2761 IMG_2762 These past few days have been so very full and a rollercoaster of emotions for me. I thought I was okay until Thursday night when we attended K's eighth grade buddy's promotion ceremony. I was so happy for her buddy and her mother that I cried. Then my cries turned to sobs when I watched and listened to all the love the students and faculty had for one another. There is just this amazing bond and feeling of hope, that words can not describe, found in Waldorf schools. My heart broke for my children as I realized they would not get to experience it any longer. K absolutely adores her eighth grade buddy and seeing them play together until very late that night was bittersweet.
My heartache continued the next day as I awoke crying my heart out. I was unable to get my children up and out of bed on time because I just couldn't stop the tears. Normally I want them to see my emotions, so they know that it's normal to experience them, but I didn't want to start off K's last day of school (possibly ever) with me crying. I got it together enough to get us all out the door and dropped K off in her classroom. As soon as I gave her a kiss goodbye I turned around and burst into tears all over again. It was like that all day. I was a blubbery mess, but got through it. Hugging my children and singing Amazing Grace over and over again with my girls helped me remember the bigger picture. Well, that and clinging on to hope that we can return here in four years, because truly, this is not just a school but a community of love; a family.
p.s - Sorry this post is a bit up and down (I can tell by the response that it must be a bit too much for you, too!) but that is where my heart and mind are at right now.

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