Thursday, April 7, 2011
Have you ever heard of such a thing? Either had I until recently...
We noticed right after little L was born that he wasn't opening his left eye as much as his right. Our midwife said that was normal and it was just probably from the birth. A couple of weeks went by and when our doctor saw it she didn't seem concerned but referred us to an eye specialist just to be sure.
When we went, the specialist ran a couple of tests and then came to the conclusion that he has congenital (inborn) Horner's Syndrome. The droopy eyelid is one of the symptoms of it. He really didn't go into details about what it is and honestly, I am still utterly clueless about it. But from my reading 'Horner syndrome isn't a disease itself. Rather, it's a sign of another medical problem — such as a stroke, tumor or spinal cord injury — that damages the nerves to your face. There's no specific treatment for Horner syndrome. Instead, treatment is directed at the underlying cause, when possible.'
The doctor told us that a tumor could be the cause of it so he wanted to get an MRI done to see if that is the case. Can I just say that the word tumor is not something you say to an emotional new mama?!
I felt so small, helpless and downright petty for going into that appointment being concerned about little things like his droopy eyelid and how it would effect him growing up. Even though he was born with this I instantly felt guilty and as if I was to blame. I am so very grateful for my Mom and K's wise teachers for helping me past that so I could fully be there for him and mentally prepare myself for what lies ahead.
I am still trying to understand it all, it's a whole lot to take in, so please forgive my thoughts being all over the place in this post and my lack of details.
In the meantime, L goes in for an MRI tomorrow to see if it is a tumor. It's an all day ordeal. My little guy will be sedated for this and they expect him not to nurse for four house before his arrival time (plus another two hours on top of that before his scan time). That's a lot to ask of a one month old baby, in my opinion.
It will be a long day for all of us but I pray answers will come from it. One thing I do know for certain is that we will always be there for him and he will be one strong little guy in the end because of all of this.